The Sky-High Etiquette of In-Flight Refreshments: A Miss Manners Guide

Dear Miss Manners,

I find myself utterly exasperated during the beverage service on airplanes. It seems a simple enough transaction, yet it frequently devolves into a scene of pushing, demanding, and general ill-manners. How does one navigate this airborne obstacle course with dignity?

Sincerely, Perplexed Passenger

Dear Perplexed,

Ah, the aerial refreshment ritual! It is, indeed, a crucible for one’s civility, revealing the best and, alas, often the very worst of human nature at 30,000 feet.

While the confines of an aircraft may test one’s patience, they are precisely why good manners become not just a virtue, but an absolute necessity for collective sanity.

Let us first address the approach. As the beverage cart makes its majestic, albeit sometimes ponderous, journey down the aisle, resist the urge to pounce.

It is not a race, nor is the flight attendant a personal butler. Have your request ready, but do not shout it from three rows away or begin rattling off your order before they have even reached your seat. A polite "Excuse me, when you have a moment," if you must flag them, is far preferable to an aggressive gesticulation.

When it is your turn, speak clearly and concisely.

There is no need for a dramatic monologue about your preference for obscure artisanal kombucha that you “always get.” If it is not on the cart or within the flight attendant’s purview, a simple "Oh, I see. Then a sparkling water, please," with a pleasant smile, will suffice. Remember, their primary duty is safety, and serving beverages is a secondary, often rushed, task.

Do not make it more difficult for them.

Furthermore, observe the unspoken rules of spatial awareness. Do not lean halfway into the aisle, creating an impassable barrier for the cart or fellow passengers attempting to use the lavatory. Keep your elbows in, and if you are in an aisle seat, be prepared to momentarily retract any protruding limbs or belongings to allow for smooth passage.

Reaching over a sleeping neighbor to grab your drink from the cart is an egregious violation of personal space and common decency. Should you need something, a gentle tap and a quiet "Excuse me, would you mind?" is the proper approach.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, a simple "Thank you" goes an astonishingly long way.

Flight attendants are not automatons; they are individuals performing a service under often challenging conditions. Acknowledging their effort with genuine gratitude elevates the entire experience, not just for them, but for you and those around you. It reminds everyone that even in the metal tube hurtling through the sky, we are all still part of a civil society.

So, dear Perplexed, next time you hear the tell-tale rattle of the beverage cart, take a deep breath, prepare your request, and remember that grace under pressure is the hallmark of true refinement.

Your fellow passengers, and the overworked crew, will undoubtedly appreciate your composure.

Yours truly,

Miss Manners