The Family Plan: A Formulaic Ride Through Familiar Territory

Ah, the lure of the quiet life. It’s a trope as old as cinema itself, isn't it? That formidable figure, once a whirlwind of danger and daring, now contentedly pushing a grocery cart and fretting over soccer practice. Apple TV+ leans heavily into this well-worn path with its latest action-comedy, The Family Plan, starring Mark Wahlberg. It’s a concept that, on paper, promises a delightful clash of worlds: suburban mundanity meets high-stakes espionage. But for all its aspirations, the film, unfortunately, feels a bit too much like a well-packaged, albeit slightly bland, meal.

Wahlberg plays Dan Morgan, a seemingly ordinary family man residing in a picture-perfect Buffalo suburb. He's got the loving wife, Jessica (Michelle Monaghan), a couple of angsty teens glued to their screens, and an adorable baby. He’s an unassuming car salesman, a dedicated dad—the whole nine yards. Only, you know the drill, right? Dan has a past. A very, very dangerous past as a government assassin, now catching up to him in the most inconvenient way possible. Cue the unexpected road trip, forcing Dan to pack up his entirely unsuspecting family for what he pretends is a spur-of-the-moment vacation, all while dodging vengeful figures from his former life.

Now, this setup is ripe for both genuine thrills and heartfelt comedy. Think Mr. & Mrs. Smith, or perhaps a more domestic spin on True Lies. Yet, The Family Plan struggles to carve out its own identity. Director Simon Cellan Jones, while certainly capable, seems to have been tasked with delivering a product that ticks all the boxes without ever really challenging the viewer or its stars to step outside their comfort zones. The action sequences are competent, sure, featuring a few well-choreographed fights and car chases, but they rarely land with any real visceral impact or originality. It's all very... watchable, but never truly gripping.

And honestly, that’s kind of the rub with the whole film. The humor, often relying on the juxtaposition of extreme danger with mundane family squabbles, tends to fall flat. The teens, played by Zoe Colletti and Van Crosby, are given fairly stereotypical roles—the social media addict and the gamer, respectively—and their arc feels less like genuine character development and more like a narrative requirement. Monaghan, a fantastic actress, is largely relegated to the "concerned wife" role, reacting to Dan's increasingly bizarre behavior without ever quite getting enough material to truly shine. Her moments of empowerment feel a little too little, too late.

Wahlberg himself delivers exactly what you'd expect: a dependable performance as the stoic, slightly bewildered action hero who just wants to protect his loved ones. He's good at it, no doubt, but there's a certain predictability to his portrayal that mirrors the film's overall lack of surprises. We've seen him play this character, or variations thereof, many times before. It's comfortable, perhaps even reassuring, but it doesn't exactly leave a lasting impression.

Ultimately, The Family Plan feels like a movie designed by algorithm—a perfectly acceptable piece of entertainment that fulfills its genre requirements without ever truly innovating or stirring any deep emotions. It's the kind of film you might put on as background noise during a family gathering, offering mild amusement without demanding much attention. If you're looking for a Sunday afternoon watch that won't challenge you too much and offers a few familiar laughs, it might just fit the bill. But if you're hoping for something with a bit more punch, a genuine surprise, or a truly memorable family dynamic, you might find yourself wishing for a different plan altogether.