Ben Youngs Uncensored: Family Trauma, Coaching Divides, and Life Beyond England Rugby

In a profoundly candid revelation, former England rugby sensation Ben Youngs has peeled back the curtain on the immense personal struggles that shadowed his glittering international career. At the heart of his reflection is a stark contrast between the empathetic support he felt he lacked from current England coach Steve Borthwick during periods of intense family trauma, and the direct, rugby-focused approach he valued from predecessor Eddie Jones.

Youngs, a venerable figure in English rugby with 127 caps, described navigating an incredibly difficult period off the field.

His wife, Charlotte, suffered two miscarriages during his final years with England, a devastating private battle compounded by the ongoing health challenges faced by his brother, Tom, who was battling ocular melanoma. These deeply personal crises were a constant backdrop to the demands of elite international sport, creating an emotional landscape Youngs found challenging to traverse.

His perception of Steve Borthwick, under whom he played for Leicester and later England, during this tumultuous time is clear: a perceived absence of empathy.

“I didn’t get empathy from Borthwick,” Youngs stated directly, recounting instances where he felt his personal suffering was not adequately acknowledged or addressed within the team environment. This wasn't a call for special treatment, but rather a yearning for understanding and human connection amidst professional pressures.

Conversely, Youngs holds Eddie Jones in high regard, particularly for his pragmatic and unyielding focus on rugby.

Despite Jones's often-criticized intense style, Youngs appreciated the clear boundaries and expectations. “He just wants to talk about rugby and I’m fine with that,” Youngs explained. For him, Jones's method, while not overtly emotional, provided a different kind of stability: a clear, unwavering path forward on the field, allowing Youngs to compartmentalize and find solace in the game itself.

The weight of these personal issues undoubtedly impacted Youngs’ performance and his eventual decision to retire from international rugby after the 2023 Six Nations.

He admitted to reaching a point where the emotional and physical toll became unsustainable. The joy of playing for England, once all-consuming, was increasingly overshadowed by anxieties at home. His decision was not made lightly, but came from a place of needing to prioritize his family and his own well-being.

Looking back, Youngs reflects on the brutal demands of professional sport and the expectation for athletes to perform flawlessly regardless of their private battles.

His story is a poignant reminder that behind every celebrated athlete is a human being grappling with life’s inevitable challenges. Now retired from the international stage, Youngs is finding a new rhythm, cherishing time with his family, and embracing life beyond the intense spotlight of England rugby, carrying with him the lessons learned from both triumphs and profound personal adversity.